By Grace Allen

For older adults who live alone or lack nearby family support, everyday planning can pose unexpected challenges, from transportation and safety to medical decision-making and social connection. The Solo Agers Discussion Group at the Norfolk Senior Center was created to address exactly those concerns.

Now one year old, the group offers a space for discussion, shared problem-solving, and community building among residents who are aging alone.

Becky Poynot, the outreach coordinator for the Norfolk Senior Center, facilitates the meetings, which are held on the fourth Monday of each month at 11 a.m. Attendance is flexible, Poynot said. “It’s a very low-commitment group. You can come once, or you can come every month. There’s no requirement.”

Poynot said the idea for the Solo Agers group took shape after she attended the Massachusetts Council on Aging state conference in early 2025. A speaker addressed concerns about seniors who don’t have family support and don’t have anybody to list as an emergency contact. 

“It was just a very basic premise of, what if you do not have someone to call? That touched a nerve for me,” recalled Poynot.

The topic was personal for Poynot, who had moved to Norfolk from Texas. “When I moved here, I had no one to put down for my children’s emergency contact. I didn’t know a soul,” she said. “I wound up asking my realtor, ‘Can I put you down, because I know no one else?’”

That experience shaped her understanding of how stressful aging without built-in support can be.

According to AARP, twenty-one percent of U.S. adults age 50 and older now live alone. That’s 24 million people, and those numbers continue to grow. Longer lifespans, far-flung families, low marriage rates or “gray divorces,” and an increase in childlessness are fueling the trend.

While the Solo Agers group offers emotional support, Poynot is careful about how it is framed.

“We call it a discussion group and not necessarily a support group,” she said. “We do have a topic almost every week, broad things like transportation, housekeeping, or medical power of attorney.”

At its core, however, the group is about connection. “A lot of it is building the community of people who are in the same boat as you,” Poynot said.

Participants include individuals without children, those whose children live far away, and people who are widowed or never married. “Those are some unique situations for people who are aging alone,” she noted.

Discussions often focus on issues that may be overlooked by those with family support.

“We’ve talked about everything from how difficult it is to put the sheets on your bed when you live alone, to if you fall and there’s no one to come check on you,” Poynot said.

Other challenges include winter safety and mobility. “Little things like, how do you get your mail on an icy day? How do you roll your garbage cans out if your mobility is limited?” she said.

Transportation is a recurring concern. “It’s a huge issue,” Poynot said. “People drive well beyond when they should — and they know it — because there’s not really another option.”

Medical logistics can be equally difficult. “If you need somebody to pick you up after your eyes have been dilated, or after a colonoscopy when you’re loopy, you can’t call a taxi for that,” she said. “They have to know the person.”

The group also serves as a hub for sharing trusted local resources, including recommendations for housekeepers, attorneys, emergency response devices, and transportation options. “People have opinions about who they like, who has good customer service, and who actually serves Norfolk,” Poynot said.

Outside speakers at the meetings have included representatives from the Norfolk Police Department and Fire Department, though Poynot noted that even first responders are sometimes surprised by the realities of aging alone.

“They’ll say, ‘Just put down your next-door neighbor,’” she said. “But a lot of people don’t know their neighbors.”

There are no strict requirements to participate, nor is it limited to Norfolk residents. “You can self-identify as a solo ager,” Poynot explained. “If you feel like maybe you’re lacking support as you age, even if you live with someone, then you’re absolutely welcome in the group.”

As the group enters its second year, Poynot says interest continues to grow. “There are people who come every single month from the start,” she said. “We have a really great core group.”

For more information about the Solo Agers group at the Norfolk Senior Center, contact Poynot at 508-528-4430 or [email protected].